


@devillustrator: anonymous requested "romantic handjob"

by isadorator



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Crack, F/M, Flirting Through Art Commissions, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, this is a strange and ridiculous fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-17
Updated: 2017-11-17
Packaged: 2019-02-03 15:28:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12751077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/isadorator/pseuds/isadorator
Summary: Nathaniel is a Starving Artist™ that regularly gets commissioned by Adrien to draw fluffy and cute LadyNoir art. But everything changed when the Hormone Nation attacked.





	@devillustrator: anonymous requested "romantic handjob"

**Author's Note:**

> This fic's concept was originally born a year ago during a Discord conversation following Huffie posting [this hilarious comic](http://nsfhuffie.tumblr.com/post/154624018293/just-want-to-throw-this-out-there-headcanon). I decided to use it to fill the prompt for Ladrien June 2016 Day 27: Caught in the Act.
> 
> I...really have no excuse for this unbetaed nonsense except for the fact that I wanted unbetaed nonsense XD

On Tuesday, Nathaniel lifted his head from the library table, eyebrow raised.

“You want me to draw Ladybug and Chat Noir kissing?” he repeated.

Adrien, red-faced and practically sweating through his shirt, nodded quickly.

Nathaniel prided himself on being a professional. Adrien was one of his best clients, regularly commissioning LadyNoir pieces from him through collège, lycée, and now university, but this was the first time his request involved anything as scandalous as _kissing_.

Chat Noir piggybacking Ladybug, yes. Chat Noir and Ladybug holding hands, yes. But kissing? _Unthinkable_.

Until now.

After having drawn for him for so long, Nathaniel immediately understood Adrien’s true intentions.

“I can do that,” said Nathaniel. “Are you looking for anything specific? Like a certain pose?”

Adrien shook his head. “N-no, I trust your judgement.”

“Okay.” Nathaniel leaned back in his chair, mentally reviewing his schedule. “My professor’s having us do critiques in class this week…I think I can have it for you by Friday.”

  


* * *

  


On Saturday, Nathaniel woke up to 32 messages from Adrien. It was mainly keysmashing and demands that he call as soon as possible because _this was not what was asked for_.

“This is totally what you asked for,” Nathaniel said when he called. “They’re kissing and everything.”

“ _I DIDN’T ASK FOR THEM TO HAVE SEX_ ,” Adrien whisper screamed.

Nathaniel pulled up the commissioned digital painting on his laptop (full body, lined, and coloured, as per Adrien’s usual order). He double-checked that, yes, Ladybug and Chat Noir were kissing while boning, specifically in the lotus position on an anonymous rooftop.

“You said you trusted my judgement, remember?” Nathaniel replied. “And we both know this is what you _really_ wanted.”

Adrien had obviously decided to explore his sexuality in not-safe-for-work ways, and Nathaniel was more than happy to be Adrien’s guide on this wondrous journey.

Strangled choking emitted from his cell’s speaker before the line went dead.

  


* * *

  


On Monday, Adrien tracked down Nathaniel in the courtyard on campus, pulling him to the side.

“For the record, I absolutely did not request you draw porn for that last piece,” Adrien declared, blushing to his roots.

“Uh huh,” said Nathaniel, playing along.

“You decided that on your own.”

“Mh hmm.”

“So this is not something I would ever contemplate asking without your terrible influence.”

“Of course.”

Adrien worried his lip between his teeth before finally blurting out, “Can you draw Ladybug petting Chat Noir’s cat ears while he’s g-going down on her?”

“Yeah,” Nathaniel answered easily. “Any other requests?”

  


* * *

  


A few weeks later, Nathaniel was at his favourite art supply store, contemplating whether to buy another sketchbook, when he ran into Marinette.

Somehow, they ended up spending the rest of the morning in a café, talking and catching up with each other.

“I can’t believe how much your art has improved lately!” she gushed, and Nathaniel smiled, basking under her praise. “Speaking of your art blog, I noticed your not-safe-for-work blog has a new theme…?”

Nathaniel recalled the series of risqué LadyNoir paintings he’d done for Adrien and shrugged. “Gotta give the people what they want.”

“And you’re…okay with that?” Marinette asked, her cheeks pinking. “I mean, Ladybug and Chat Noir are actual people. You’ve _met_ them. You’re not…weirded out drawing stuff like that?”

“Not really,” said Nathaniel, shrugging again. “It’s a commission, I need the money, and it didn’t hit any of my hard no’s. It’s as simple as that.”

Marinette took a sip of her latte, looking thoughtful.

  


* * *

  


When the anonymous email came in requesting a ‘romantic handjob’ between Adrien Agreste and Ladybug, Nathaniel rolled his eyes good-naturedly before accepting the payment.

When Adrien stormed up to him the day after the painting was posted and dragged him away before he could get his morning espresso, Nathaniel was far less amused.

“ _What was that?!_ ” Adrien hissed.

“What was _what?_ ” asked Nathaniel, glaring.

Adrien grabbed Nathaniel’s shoulders and very gently shook him. “T-that post! From last night! I didn’t—I wouldn’t! But! B-but if it wasn’t me…then who…? Could it be— _her?_ ”

Nathaniel rubbed his hands over his face, stretching the skin as he tried to wake up.

“I’m too tired for any of that to make sense,” he said.

Seemingly two seconds away from combusting, Adrien opened his mouth, then closed it, then opened it to ask, “W-who commissioned the art you posted last night?”

Nathaniel dropped his hands so he could glare at Adrien harder. “Really? _Really?_ ”

Backing away, Adrien raised his arms in surrender. Like he hadn’t totally sent the request himself on anon because he was too embarrassed to admit his kinks. And now he was interrupting _Nathaniel’s espresso_.

“Don’t act coy, Adrien,” snapped Nathaniel. “We _both_ know who requested it.”

Adrien’s eyes widened in shock, and Nathaniel could not deal with whatever sexual crisis Adrien was having. Not until his espresso had a chance to work its sweet, sweet magic.

“I have stuff to do today, but text me if you need to talk later,” said Nathaniel, and Adrien’s answer was the quietest whine he’d ever heard.

Nathaniel decided that was good enough and hurried back to the café.

  


* * *

  


Later that night, Nathaniel got another anonymous commission request for Ladybug and Adrien. The email address was different, but he couldn’t imagine anyone but Adrien asking for it. Especially when the request was essentially him rubbing Ladybug to orgasm over her suit while they were in a pantry.

Nathaniel did his best not to judge his clients, but Adrien was always painfully obvious.

The ‘Ladrien’ requests, as his followers dubbed the celebrity pairing, flooded in over the next few weeks. They were always anonymous and always with different email addresses, ranging from romantic to raunchy in its laundry list of kinks. Nathaniel patiently waited for the day Adrien would get up the courage to ask for himself and Chat Noir in some kind of compromising position, followed by the inevitable fantasy threesome.

Instead, Adrien asked for a two-page, full colour comic where Ladybug snuck into Adrien’s room and ravished him.

Raising his eyebrow as he read through the request, Nathaniel grew intrigued. It’d been a while since his last comic commission, and he’d never had one come in for his not-safe-for-work blog. This could actually be fun, a chance to stretch his artistic wings a little.

Nathaniel emailed Adrien back, quoting a price and letting him know that photo references of Adrien’s room’s interior and exterior were needed for accuracy. He graciously didn’t point out the fact that only someone with access to the Agreste Mansion could get those photos.

When Adrien’s reply email was an attached magazine article about the lavish lifestyle of the Agrestes, complete with a photo tour of the mansion, Nathaniel was almost proud.

“Gotta give Adrien credit for keeping up the act,” he muttered, and then started sketching a rough of the panel layout.

  


* * *

  


One week later, Adrien lost track of how many times he’d read through Nathaniel’s comic. It was up on the blog now for everyone to see, for _Ladybug_ to see—

He gripped his cock through his pyjama pants, inhaling sharply at the pressure.

( _He was so very, very glad Plagg decided to sleep in his closet tonight._ )

Slipping his other hand under his shirt to hug himself, Adrien leaned back in his chair and imagined how Ladybug might react when she saw the comic.

Would she be curled up in bed, transformed back into the most beautiful girl in Paris? Would she see it on her tablet, its light reflecting off her flushed cheeks and wide eyes? Would she bury soft sighs into her pillow, wanting to touch herself as she imagined touching him?

Adrien shut his eyes, squeezing his shaft as he hoped for something else.

Maybe she wouldn’t be content to stay where she was. Maybe Ladybug would understand what he was asking for through the comic, would transform and race to his side and take anything he offered. Maybe she’d want his lips on hers or his hands on her body or his cock inside her or—or…

Maybe Ladybug would just want _everything_ , want every bit of Adrien—including his pining heart.

Biting back a longing moan, Adrien pushed down his pants and boxers to his knees, letting himself imagine that it was Ladybug running her hand over his cock and grazing her thumb over the tip.

Lost in the familiar fantasy, he didn’t notice someone else entering his room until gloved hands rested on his shoulders.

“H-hi,” said Ladybug, her voice low and hoarse, and Adrien felt his breath stutter. He craned his neck to see Ladybug standing behind his chair, her hungry eyes flicking to Nathaniel’s comic on his screen, then lingering on his _occupied_ hands, all before settling on his face. “I got your message.”

“Oh,” Adrien murmured.

Ladybug wet her lips, the action shooting a jolt of heat through him. Seeing her flushed face and mussed hair, looking nearly as wrecked and wanting as him, gave him the courage to stay put and say what he wanted.

“I-I got yours too, Ladybug. All of them,” he said, feeling himself twitch under her sharpening gaze. He spread his knees a little wider, cock still in his hand as he shakily patted his lap with the other. “Do…do you want to take a seat and…talk?”

 _Talk_. Like that was all either of them wanted to do.

“Yeah,” she breathed out.

It felt like a punch to the gut when her weight settled on him, the curve of her amazing rear snug against his bare thighs, her long legs bracketing his waist.

“Let’s talk about those commissions of yours,” she said, looping an arm around Adrien’s neck as she ran a finger down his forearm. Goosebumps trailed after her touch, and he wondered at how easy this was after weeks of back and forth through Nathaniel’s art.

“You started it,” he replied, placing his free hand on Ladybug’s waist. Massaging her hip bone, Adrien greedily memorized the feel of her shuddering against him.

“I did,” she admitted.

Her finger reached his clenched fist, following the ring his hand made around his cock without touching the tip peeking out.

It was _torture_ , one almost as bad as the kiss she placed high on his cheek.

“ _Why?_ ” he rasped, shivering as she pressed another hot kiss near his ear. Her finger circled slowly, touching nothing but his hand, leaving him dizzy and aching and needing to know, needing _more_ —

Ladybug reached up to cup his cheeks, a complicated expression in her eyes he could barely catch before she kissed him.

Her soft lips parted his, the slick heat of her tongue meeting his mouth, and it wasn’t the sweet kiss of true love he’d first imagined she’d share with him, but he’d take it. He wanted her fingers running through his hair and tugging at it, wanted her desperate moan when he reached behind her to squeeze her ass with both hands. He wanted her to roll her hips forward, sliding up in his lap until his stiff cock was nestled between his stomach and the junction of her thighs. He wanted her to— _grind_ —

It was embarrassing how fast he came.

“Fuck,” she said as Adrien muffled his groan in her chest. She rubbed herself against his cock, following his frantic movements with a single-minded intensity. “Oh _fuck_ , Adrien, h-how— _mmm_.”

With Ladybug riding him through the aftershocks of the most intense orgasm he’d ever had, Adrien was pretty okay with her dodging his question.

That is until she kissed him again, devouring his slack mouth until she pulled back with a breathless, “I did it because I wanted to see you like this.”

Thrilled lust tried its hardest to cut through his lazy afterglow.

“But…I also kinda wanted to see it while you were inside me,” she continued, impish smile on her face, and Adrien was helpless to do anything but kiss her, pouring every drop of his desire and love into it until she was whimpering.

“You want to keep _talking_ in my bed?” he asked when he broke it off.

“Only if you tell me why _you_ commissioned Nathaniel,” she countered, still clutching him.

“I’d be happy to,” he said.

Adrien held on to Ladybug as he stood from his chair, taking the chance to give her another kiss. He took one step and tripped when his pants tangled around his ankles, sending them both crashing to the floor.


End file.
